Dethroned socialite Paris Hilton recently made “Headlines” for signing to Cash Money records. We’re not sure how much “Crew Love” was partitioned out to make this happen, but we’re sure “Marvin’s Room” was jumping. With the one-time reality star re-igniting her “HYFR” we came up with some possible album titles, first singles and even food sponsors for her Cash Money debut. Why food? Hilton once padded her bank accounting shilling for Carl’s Jr.
That’s hot.
5) “600 Degrees: Paris Is Burning”
Lead Single: “The Box Is Hot”
Album Sponsor: In-N-Out Burger
If you saw the “One Night In Paris” sex tape and still have your vision intact you know where this album is headed.
4) “Chop-Her City In The Ghetto”
Lead Single: “N*ggas In Paris” Pt II
Album Sponsor: Chik-Fil-A
After pretending to do actual work on “The Simple Life” we’ve come to accept that there is only one real “job” Paris has ever pulled off.
3) “Spank Me Later”
Lead Single: “That B*tch Killed My Vibe” (Kim K Diss)
Album Sponsor: Jack In The Box
With Kim Kardashian usurping her title of “Most Famous For Doing Nothing” she’s got to be feeling a little salty. A little venting is inevitable.
2) “I Am Not A Human Being 3”
Lead Single: “Shot For Me” Pt 2 Penicillin remix
Album Sponsor: Long John Silvers
Fried fish. Need we say more?
1) Pink Fry Day: Paris Is STILL Burning
Lead Single: “Fireworks” (Remix) Featuring Pamela Anderson & Mr. Marcus
Album Sponsor: Five Guys
After neglecting to pay some storage fees Paris had personal items auctioned off to a company that launched a website called “ParisExposed” with plenty of random photos with her and at least five guys doing strange ish.
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